My b-day

I've disappointed with my life and everything happened.. useless and speechless now... I know it's not easy to get through life but isn't that too much for me? Today is my 19th Birthday... I'm quiet happy on this day.. I lost a friends and finally I 'found' it back... many of us are too happy to have this friends back... A lot of funny things happened on today as well... I felt too touch to have this group of friend because they let me know that I'm not alone... their present even surprising and really shocked me because I didn't thought of 'that' as present before... It's showed and proved they really cared of me.. they really take my words into heart... Thank you loads... I love you all very much!!! you all make me stronger and brave enough to live it on... =) Although it's a great 26 Septenber 2006, I end up crying for my last 30 minutes birthday because of stupid, idiot matter (at least this matter had been bothering me for quiet a long period).... I hate those feeling that suddenly came up to me... I shoudn't been crying for so long because of those unnecessary matter.... Useless !!!!!!

Run from life

It's already a few days having gastric.. it seems like it didn't get any better.. mood also didn't change.. still depressed, struggling in heart.. day after day I realize I don't know how to face human.. sad to say that human is too complicated in their own way.. you wish everything should be fine and ok but it isn't go your way.. you wish to have the ability to solve every problem in your life but you definitely couldn't.. and that's the reason why most of the people choose to run away from life.. dilemma is one part of life which we couldn't avoid.. for me, I don't think I'm brave enough to face my life.. yet I don't have the ability to face human.. I've done my best.. I hope I am.. when I don't know what should I do it's most probably the time for me to run.. or what I can say is my ability only allow me to run away..

Real world

lately quite tired with the life I have.. life is really not easy.. Sometimes I really don't know what should and shouldn't be expect in life... surprisingly, life is not as easy as math.. it's not always being equal and please.. don't ever expect equal treatment in life.. these few days I really learn a lot... son't expect the same way as you treat people... don't trust anyone (even you think the one that closest to you)... don't ever try to put your heart to anyone or any matter... if not.. in turn, you are the one that will get hurt.. that kind of feeling no one can understand even though you try to share with others... don't be kind to others, people will think you have intention towards them or trying to show off how helpful you are... is time for me to wake up... I'm here to welcome myself into the real world...

Disappointed Day

Finally final exam is over... actually quite happy and release.. but it's quite tiring as well because I couldn't sleep last night... totally lost in my own world... thinking about everything happened on me... decided to go to Sg Wang after exam but incidentally... something very sad happended... *haih* I'm really disappointed wih all kind of things happened... we've been waiting for a girl for a long time.. (at least 1 and a half hour) not only we couldn't get her... we don't even know why acually she need so much time.. if you really need so much time, why don't you just tell directly.. *sigh* I really couldn't take on this kind of attitude.. I hope she will change after i've told her about her CRAZY LATE MISTAKE... Melanie is now finish writing.. a special blog writing at MC... Signing Off...