Suffer "Traps"

I don't understand.. why am I getting myself into this kind of "traps".

It's extremely suffering.

I guess I've learnt from it. No matter how hard you try to make it, nothing can be force.

If things really happened to be your way, it will still turns to another way too.

God.. Must remember this.

Never ever falling into this kind of "traps" again!

生态定律的一线之差

“有一些人跟事，是永恒不变的”

以前,
从没质疑过这句名言。
但是人越大,
却跟这句名言越来越遥远...

不是不相信,
只是就算不说出口,
心里也清楚,
这世界上,
没有任何人跟事,是永恒不变的。

以前的我们,
懵懂过,激情过,计较过,辛酸过...
这些都是无可否认的事实。
它,曾经那么地真实。
现在,还是那么真实的回忆,
只是这回忆有没有延续呢...

常想,
任何东西都是双方面才有办法维持平衡。

单方面的努力,
不是不可能,
只是很容易疲惫,
一旦疲惫了,
放弃了,
坚决不再回头的,
往往都是一直在默默努力的这一方。

或许,
变质了就是变质了,
不需要强求,
而是需要放手。

Hard Time

Last post dated April. Almost one month ago.

Throughout this one month, I actually felt like blogging, expressing my depressed, thoughts, hardships and feeling, but I have really no time.

Took over a big project, which make me really tense up, I couldn't even smile everyday, since everyone is waiting for your cue, seeing you how to make this never ever done before big project happen (or in negative terms, see how you die)...

That's really not a good feeling, and I hate this kind of feeling.

I'm still new in position, why can't they all give me some support/guiding opinion???

Perhaps this is the real world.

Although I was tired, I still started to think deeply why am I going into this position..

Is that what I want in my life? *miserable*

I like team works, but can we have a good one?

I know I couldn't control how people think and act, but I sincerely hope that this world could have more supportive people around.

Pls don't easily lose control by expressing the temper or negative thoughts... If you think you are having a hard time, others does! It will just making others feel even bad...

Me - Myself

My last blog entry dated Jan 17,which means I dumb my blog long enough.

Or maybe you can said that I don't have time,or I'm not brave enough to write down any of my thought these few days.

This last until I accidentally enter a colleague's (soon leaving colleague) blog. I readed one of his entry and I think maybe it's time for me to face myself.

Not sure whether it applies to media field or most of the working adults, I just feel like I'm trying not to have too many own thoughts (which this will not happen in the past me).

Therefore,I don't dare to think, don't dare to write diary,don't dare to touch my blog.

I know it's is obviously not mentally healthy, maybe it's just a trend I try to fit into the real world.

Right until today,I feel very tired,very fed up, and a thought just cross my mind...

why am I doing all these thing?

I still wonder... but at least, I manage to figure out sometime to once again, have my own thoughts, hopes my little thinking will not flooded by mainstream working field thinking...

Personal Updates

Have been in a new job for 1 week.

Sometimes I feel that I already use to it, but sometimes it's not.

I don't know why. I think most of the time I'll usually get a 'bomb'...

and that's also those time I couldn't hide my shockness...

Luckily I only get my eyes to open so big but not yelling yet XD

Stress is coming to me,

obviously those stress is even stressful than last time.

If it's like to be put in words, it makes me reluctant to take food,

and make me have panda eyes everyday :(

2010, a new year... what a new gift that's given to me...

16th Jan 2010 Onwards,Every Saturday 6pm

As you can see from the TV promo and teaser, yes, it's a program that my team produced,

and that's also what I've been workout for last 7 months.

Heart Talk lays its foundation on previous big news.



In a sight view of news reporter, we always found that it's getting a lot of attention when the big news happened, and readers always flooded by facts and figures such as how many people died etc...

But, we've forgotten one most important thing, it's not the number and facts in the news, but story behind the news itself.

Therefore, we wanted you to see through those previous big news people, find out how's their life and things goes on after the incident.

It's being very hard for us, especially as we gone through those cases happened in 70s or 80s.. I would said that one of the biggest challenge is to find out these people's contact.

It's always a hard thing when you only get facts, figures and name on the old newspaper, but not contact number or address. By using any networks, and gone through many diversions, we finally found out those people.

This doesn't mean that we manage to proceed on smoothly, we still need to talk to them, get to know what happen to them throughout years after the incident, and persuade them to let us proceed on with the shooting.

I will said it's really a very very very tough job, and we always change on the cases as most of them do not want to be discover by media anymore.

You may think that I'm pushing hardly for this program, hard-selling everywhere. Frankly speaking, I really do hope audience will watch it and see our effort.

It's not easy to produce a program. What it rewards and make us move forward is only YOUR WATCHING !

Heart Talk - TV Promo 1

ntv7 brand new current affairs.



Starting 16th january 2010, every saturday 6pm :)

Teaser

It's Always There

I thought I went through it.

Yes, I thought.

But in fact,I realize it's a thought that still always deep in my heart,

and now,

it prove that I'm just too naive,

it's always there.

没了"烦扰" 但也少了你

几经盼望 终于盼到了
但是还是失落而归

在倒数新生活的日子里
欣喜没了"烦扰"
可是
失去你 却是我意料之外的事

是我期望太高？
还是早该预料到会少了你
这...
应该就是所谓的无缘吧
想着想着
心里不自觉哼起了"少了你的我该怎么办"

Sandy Lam Live Concert 2009

Got a chance to watch Sandy Lam concert *muahahaha*

So happy and glad although I'm not her fans,

and I know very little of her :)

I got shocked when she first sang and after a few hours.

Her voice is so pleasant yet so powerful,

and her live presentation even manage to control the whole atmosphere.

为你我受冷风吹,伤痕,诱惑的街,爱上一个不回家的人,夜太黑,听说爱情回来过,

至少还有你...

are songs that I love and brightens up the night.

*OMG* I starts to fall in love with this Diva

Share a video clip you all.

Let's feel the atmosphere together ;)

Never Ever Anymore

In a terrible mood since yesterday night. And it continues until today.

I do not really experience this kind of feeling after I graduate.

I hate irresponsible. I hate being unrespectful.

I hate it needs me to readjust my thing JUST to fit in the so "UNPLAN" thing instead it is a so simple yet planned matter.

I even hate it sounds like it is my fault afterall.

I didn't voice my anger because I don't think it's necessary after all these,

but it doesn't mean I'm not angry and I don't have any opinion about it.

Fine, I will just conclude all this is ridiculous.

It's because I care therefore I angry. But then I will remind myself not anymore.

Because from this moment onwards, I will no longer care.

Recent

=.=" it's already mid november, omg! I've dump my blog for so long.

Everytime I feel like blogging, there must be obstacle.

Most of it is "I'm very tired", "I'm at outstation, busy shooting around",

and of course "I still have lots of work to do, where got time to blog".

T.T so sorry...

Ok,fine~~

it's really time to update of my recent activities :)

Basically still working like hell, because we've did first stage of shooting,

come back and straight away editing =.="

And now, still planning for second stage of shooting,

which will be kick off from 1st December *sigh*

But, at the same time, still have to rush for editing =.="

Everything need to be settle before January 2010.

Why everytime I have lots to mumble of my work...

but actually please don't misunderstand..

besides too tired, nervous and worry,

indeed I quite enjoy :) Maybe it's a job that I like.

I love this program more compare to Sunshine Project,

and Editors Time. It's a very-hard-to-do program,

but maybe is it's style, I really like this kind of warmth program.

Cheers & Gambatae to myself :)

FIR. (p/s : Not F.I.R taiwan band)

A good saturday (or perhaps a healthy saturday), filled up a healthy lifestyle.

I seldom practice healthy lifestyle, part and parcel is because of my work.

It couldn't allow me to live that way. But somehow,

I still have some 'basic' healthy living.

And I've choose to practice it more frequent.

Jogging is one of it, and another one,

I've give it a try today.

FIR sauna. Not sure whether this is a new system,

but it's fresh to me since I never heard of this before :P



It uses Far Infrared to make your body sweat,

detox, lose weights, beauty etc :)

My health has no big problem,

but after I tried it, it did feel very good.

Skin gets smoother and feel energetic :)

Pls Give Me Some Space To Breath

.... don't know how to start this post actually, but in fact,

I really feel like blogging this matter which I couldn't find some words to describe it.

I've gone through a day (exactly is a few hours only) that I..

would now conclude as wasted.

Can't believe that I spent my night in 'this way'...

*sigh* It's awkward for me to react that way,

however, sadly, and perhaps, I did those :(

It's a good lesson, a very very good lesson,

telling me that nothing can be force...

Over

2 weeks, or 3 weeks. Finally, it leads to an end.

I hope I use a "normal heart" to treat all these.

I hope, but in fact, I'm lying.

Deep inside my heart, I know I couldn't.

Although I couldn't let off my hopes, I wish it is lesser,

as compared to last time.

Take a deep breath, I know, I have tried my best.

When things aren't in my control,

don't think on it.

Book Fair Outing Day

Went to book fair with my friend. A book lover too :)

Share some photos here ^_^

It's Chooi Ling on stage.

The only photo we took in book fair because we were wandering in book world XD.

Others photos of course we took outside of KL Convention Center *LOL*

Random

Have been non-stop busy for 2 weeks.

This morning, a public holiday morning,

finally managed to finish up the proposal.

It's really a hard time when u need to work,

and after work, u still need to think of proposal.

Luckily I still managed to relax for quarter of the public holiday :)

Went to lunch with a dear friend, Janice,

(pity her.. no public holiday for KL state), at mid valley.

After that, have a book reading time together with mask session

:) so lovely...

Then, went for a dinner. Have yummy foods *winks*

Tomorrow going to be a new day to work again. Gambatae !

No Closure :(

Finally there is 1 person from my department

got affected with influenza A (H1N1).

I just knew it.

Hoping that my department will has a closure,

at least a short onw will do, but then *sigh*

things also go against your wish.

There is no closure on my department :( so sad.

My closure dream spoilt, and now,

even force to wear mask every second :(

Realization

Frankly speaking, this is not the first day of realizing this.

I don't know it somehow happen to me only,

or it happen to my friend too.

This is none other than I'm spending almost 80% of my life on work.

*Sigh* Should I said this is life? or

that's media's life?

Not mumbling about my work...

just a little 'unbalance' in heart...