Ignorance Of Deep Feeling

"Live happily" is a simple life philosophy, everyone understand it yet not everyone can achieve that... Now, this simple philosophy can truly represent my situation and deep feeling inside my heart..

Everyday I feel good going to university, attend classes, even doing all assignmenns happily.... but I just couldn't stand with facing you face to face.. everytime I see you, even you didn't do anything to me, my heart get extremely weak, my mind went blank, my mood fluctuate, up and down non-stop..

Do you realize you are directly and indirectly affecting my life??

Sometimes I felt irritate to see your uncertain facial expressions.. that's only show you don't care.. No matter is my fault or yours you just don't care about it.. I'm terribly disappointed with you..

Back to Normal ?

Glad to see everything back to normal operation, groups settled, everyone working hard in assignments by now..

6 subjects in Year 2 Semester 2.. Each and every one of it is quite heavy as compared to previous years or semesters..

1. Tv Production

2. Screenplay and Scriptwriting

3. Media Planning

4. International Advertising

5. Communication Research Method

6. Multimedia Design and Application

I think, for most of us, the most excited subject would be TV Production.. ^.^ (coz this time we are going to produce drama)... Hahahaaha :D

For me, I think week 8 will be the busiest, stressful week for me because I have to hand in Communication Research Report, hand in Screenplay individual script, my turn to present Communication Research Report and I have to go out for TV Production drama shooting..

*Sigh* Let's start our busy life...

Warm

Grandma came back from Singapore last weekend.. I got really excited to see her although she didn't change much.. She leave for a long period and I didn't noticed that I do miss her a lot until I meet her..

Now, she's in KL for 1 month.. We visit her and she cooked for us.. *feel so touch*

When I ate what she cooked, my heart was full with warmness....

Till now only I realize I had been trying very hard to leave on my own, do everything on my own and I feel tired.....

It's so good that after a war or got upset, you have someone that always give you their love and caring...

I really appreciate grandma's goodness..

Crucial Understanding

Nowadays I'm getting speechless and speechless.. Just started a new semester and we are getting into lots of trouble and everyday going to university seems like a war for me.. If you would ask about my feeling, definitely, I will said I don't like this kind of feeling... because suppose we are still students who are going to be adults but we are not yet adults..

I can understand that we shouldn't be so stress and care about assignments and especially group members... We are not that kind that will sacrifice friends and just care about assignments.. I hope whoever involve (in our gang) can understand, we are trying our best to protect you and our friendship..

As I said before, working and friendship should be 2 separate things.. I would wish this is not 2 different things but it's a realistic world.. It's time to be matured in thinking.. If we couldn't work together doesn't mean we can't be friend.. in return, I think avoiding all working matter, we can be good friends, even better than before...

I'm sorry and would like to apologise to whoever being hurted (in our gang).. I would like to listen from you regarding your opinion and feeling since we are communication student and we must communicate.. I have my own reasons for doing things and in making every decision..

Remember, this is a realistic world, competence stands up, weaker will be failed... In order not to be fail, weaker have to stand up and follow the fast pace in society...

Sally Yeh Concert

Last friday got a surprise trip to Genting again.. 3 little girl got free ticket to Sally Yeh concert.. hahaha XD Although we don't know Sally Yeh much but life at KL is too bored.. therefore, we rushed back and went to Genting..

At first, I kept yawn in the concert because I don't know her song and I felt tired because that day was friday, we end our class quite late... but in the middle me, xiu wen and zjo were very high... how high??? hahaha high until the uncle aunty around us got very high and shout with us as well... hahahaha.. so funny la..

After concert , zjo's friend invite us to clubbing... again, we went to Safari but that night was not Ladies night, every person need to paid entrance fees and Zjo's friend paid for us.. wahh.. so good.. That night actually quite dangerous, a lot of weird people around..

5 sumthing in the morning we got a RM100 deluxe Genting Highlands room for a quick knap.. then wake up at 9 sumthing and went home...

Useless Environment

Sucks environment ruin my life.. fed up and couldn't stand with all mumbling.. Am I that worst to keep you mumbling on me huh???

I've chosen my path.. I've done my best... isn't that still not enough to satisfy you??

You make me lose temper and irrational.. I don't know what are the reasons I'm staying back with this kind of environment..

Not Ready

I'm not ready yet
I haven't prepare to accept the new challenge
I haven't figure out the best solution to solve obstacles
I'm really really not ready for a new academic semester

Day and day, I found myself getting lost.. Don't know what things to focus on, what things to ignore.. Tired of life, lost passion are the reasons for all the "not ready"..

Sat behind the lecture hall, staring at everyone's back, I couldn't concentrate, my mind wander far far away.. everyone seems the same but everyone knows deep in their heart many things changed..

Life is escaping no where
No one or things could be remain

"Eating" Trip

Before I end my 3 weeks holiday, I went to Malacca for relaxing purpose... I found that I really enjoy this holiday and it seems like too short for me.. I didn't spend much time at home.. Went out almost everyday, meeting people and found back life enthusiasim..

Last Trip for this holiday is Malacca Trip.. I would describe this trip as "Eating Trip" because I ate a lot.. it's terribly delicious and mouth-watering... haha... I seldom said that.. ;p

First time went to Jonker Walk... Love it very much.. There are sooooooo many funny and interesting there... ^^v I should have went there earlier.. Ate special cendol and Nyonya Laksa.. Although I was full, I managed to finish almost all... Never think of that delicious before.. haha..

Then, the next day evening, went to Portuguese Settlement.. Another Big Seafood dinner accompany by Malacca sea and sunset.. hahaha.. I didn't took much photos at Malacca because I spent a lot of time eating... hahaha :D I think this is a very nice photo to share with...

Nice view from Portuguese Settlement with *Malacca sea and sunset*

A Special Evening Spent with Romance and Happiness

Finally went to Eye on Malaysia with michele, wei and yan yee.. hehe.. although it's not as romantic as I think, I'm satisfied with it..

luvly skycrappers

KL view from skycrapper

Sadly, couldn't have a good chance to look at the laser show because it was raining... T_T but I managed to get a quick shot.. haha..

Laser show specially designed for Tourism Malaysia 2007

After that, went to Time Square Neway sing K.. Had our dinner and celebrate wei's birthday there... 8 something was Happy Hour Rate and it's highly expensive.. RM32++.. then it became RM44.. (expensive like hell la~ ~ but with buffet dinner la..) Since I've never tried Neway buffet dinner, I didn't complain much but I ate a lot.. because toooooo expensive... I must eat as much as I can so that it's worth it.. hahaha :D

We drank alcohol and got very high.. haha.. Poor yan yee.. she get drunk so fast.. hahaha ;p

Holiday Normal Diary

12pm - wake up, bath..

1.30pm - wandering, searching food exclude maggi mee..

2pm - aet/fed up, open PC, surf net..

3.30pm - watch TV drama..

5pm - read book/play piano..

6pm - bath again.. (opps.. sorry coz kinda luv bath)

7.30pm - go grandpa's house, have dinner together..

8pm - watch TV again..

9.30pm - listen music, starring at ceiling, mind wandering again..

10.30pm - write blog, chit-chat, reply e-mail..

11pm - watch series...

3am - sleep

This is my in-house normal holiday daily procedures.. sounds a bit boring.. Actually can't say bored but it's just a kind of lost life..

Although I think this kind of life still better than rushing assignments, have arguments, I just can't stay long with this kind of life.. 3 weeks I'm still OK.. hahaha :D

Another good point of this life is heart and mind feel stable..

Discover Funny Gathering

Suppose this holiday is bored.. but it's not as bored as I expected.. a lot of old friends called out.. One very special call was primary school friend..hehe ;p called for primary school gathering ^.^ of course i'm OK..

Then 4pm meet at Wong KoK Parkson.. But why 4pm only I was there?? Stupid them.. they are late... nevermind, I was patient.. (intentionally don't want to spoilt my holiday mood hehe :D) 4.20pm.. shit them.. finally they came.. 1, 2 ,3, 4... only 4 person?? =.=" this is what they called primary school gathering?? haih.. NEVERMIND...

After we sat down at Wong Kok, they said too little people.. fine, everyone keep calling others come Wong Kok except me..( hehe only me don't have any contact ;p) Actually, we don't have much number, therefore they said want to go house by house, knock house by house @_@ sounds stupid... but I still followed..

Finally we knocked 2 persons house... hahaha one of it is our class monitor house.. hahaha.. I never think of doing those stupid action la.. then we go 糖黏豆 yam cha again..

aiyor... whole stomach also water already..

Although very little people, this is really a good, memorable gathering , and we promise will do a class gathering on 30th june since fei is leaving to Australia... haha..

happy chit-chatting around ^.^

Self-talk

It's late mid in the night..suddenly, feel like blogging.. usually I wouldn't have this kind of feeling but today just very different... everything is flashing back into my mind, I couldn't stand with this emotion anymore, everything seems so fresh... Now only I realize I've gone through a lot of matter, no matter what had I experience, good or bad, it's already over.. I'm myself yet not as ordinary as who i am before anymore...

My Holiday

The day after exam I went for a trip with some of my coursemates.. Experience two days 1 night enjoyable trip at Genting... Hohohho =.=" Opps!!! wrong style.. and I've got a lot of 1ST TIME EXPERIENCE ^.^

Hohohoho is here ; p

Crazy people doing crazy thing

The 1st time into Outdoor Theme Park with a group of friends.. hahaha.. of course I've been to outdoor theme park but this is the first time I went with a whole gang of friend.. I still remembered that the last time I went there was Form 3.. with librarian.. Although it can be counted as went with a group of friends too, still, not all of them is my friend... that's why actually not that fun but this time very different... just that I think I was over excited and I want to challenge everything... THEN, terrible, shamful things happened.. Car racing not enough tall to enter T_T so embarrassed..... 2nd thing is I underestimate Soon Chee Haur challeng and I vomit.. haih.. don't know what to said... aiyorrrr.. that stupid guy is toooooo crazyyyy.. keep on turning turning and I don't know why he will not faint...

2nd thing is first time clubbing,went into Disco.. is Safari Disco

Surprisingly, that day is Ladies night, all female got a free entrance.. WOWWW ! great time to exposure.. only regret thing is I didn't bring suitable clothes and my high heels for clubbing purpose.. haih.. end up wore sports suits.. T_T yerrr.. first time clubbing got this kind of experience o, different from my memory... another thing is I have to carry my wallet and handphone and I don't have pocket with me.. in order not to carry during dancing, I've to wore my jacket and put all my stuff inside... but overall the experience is OK...but I hate the remix music, keep on remix and remix with the same rhythm... IDIOT!!!very tiring la...

girls on couple bridge

Skycrappers!!!! I love skycrappers.....

The next day we came down around 2pm.... should be earlier than that but we are so unlucky that Skyway having maintenance.. and we have to went down by bus.. the fastest bus we got were 2pm bus.. =.=" have to sit there for 1 hour...

End of our 2 days 1 night trip... now, we are having our own holiday....

wish everyone healthy and happy

Finally....

Finally... I finished my year 2 semester 1... finally.. I've a chance to breath after 4 months battle.. finally... I realised university life could be colourful and happy as well.... finally.... I've came out from the blackness.... finally I saw the light source of life...

Is that really just a feeling

2.43am, late mid night but currently do not feel sleepy.. or maybe I'm having insomnia again... Mind is flying here and there non-stop, everything seems fresh in my mind... Couldn't understand why I will definitely feel this during mid night, am I really miss out something in my life? predicting my life after next Monday, 7th May.. that's my 3 weeks holiday... that's the time for me to rest my head nad heart.. Hopefully I could feel stable in this holiday.. Emotion lately keep increasing and decreasing sharply.. Nothing cause it but a weird expression from heart... My heart is now as fragile as this....
Thinking that.... maybe.... I still need to develop myself and recover from past bad experience.... Just like sickness... hope I can get well soon...

Growing is a must

Suddenly feel like growing and knowing yourself is a must in a life cycle... Knowing oneself is a hard process but one must go through this process, learn about yourself, what is your life philosophy then only it could help you develop... Throughout this process, I realize stay happily is a another vital understanding and applying... During previous moment, I could hardly came across this but now, I realize the most important thing for me is only time and self-development.. After that particular period, I could easily accept that what was done was done.. I couldn't do anything but accept this and face another new challenge...

Very Moment

Suppose to study hard at this very moment, but just couldn't concentrate.. getting playful and playful.. Although studying might be essential, play is another part of life.. These few days I spent almost all my time with television and the Internet.. I know I shouldn't do that, but exactly, I don't really know what to study (except for Communication Theories).. Nowadays final exam seems like base on your foundation and creativity.. it's quite hard to determine what could you get because it may be creative to you but not to the others.. so I don't think I want to put so much effort in studying basic guidelines...

Is feeling vital to human?

I'm back to my blog.. It's been a long time since I my last post.. Recently just end a period of busy life.. Finally I've finished year 2 semester 1.. It's time for me to take a good rest before another challenge come in next 3 weeks... By the way, my final exam will start next week, which means tomorrow but I don't really expect myself to study very hard.. because I've spent lots of time playing, relaxing and enjoying my "short break"... hehe;p and I found that this semester I have difficulties to concentrate.. do you want to know why?? I couldn't let you know because I don't know the cause to it.. Today seems like having a complex, hard feeling.. I suppose I shouldn't so anything today but I did that and it ends up hurting myself... Thought time passes and I could feel better, face better, adopt better, but the hurt feeling is still there.. although I tried very hard to forget but the harms had been done.. and it just become a part of bad consequences stayed in my mind and soul...

My Thoughts

Feel abit upset with nowadays situation and surrounding around me... things just doesn't go as plan.. Something unpredictable and hurted happened... everyone (in our gang) got hurted.... no one actually mean it.. but I think it's the time to share our thoughts.. I think working (although it's just assignments) and friends should be separate.. no one should actually take advantage on friends while doing serious matter... If that is not a serious matter to you it doesn't mean others people don't care.. In that sense, responsibility and punctuality is very crucial..Another matter would be the way of communication... I understand and agreed that the rude way of speaking should be avoid since we are friends... but I also agreed that once the person became the culprit of the problem.. and everyone get mad, annoyed of that person... of course people will lost temper... I don't think this should be blame on the one that lost temper... If no one took advantage on each other, then shouln't and wouldn't be any problem... We know we are here to learn communication.. everyone has their strengths and weaknesses.. don't expect people to understand and accept the whole you... but in another way, I didn't mean to change yourself and cope with others people... just learn to grow up, take some responsibility and know your own roles.... then that's good enough...

2007, Poster for Sony DV Cam (Good Take)

2007, Poster for Sony DV Cam..... cut ! cut! cut! NG ! re-capture!!

shooting nice shot.... along roadside...

It's my "showtime"....

see.... what have you shoot???

"Wow" Let's shoot.... !!!!!

Busy and Stuck

Bz.. bz... and bz... always busy with assignments recently.. shouldn't said recently because I used to be busy in my whole semester... this year is 2007.. of course I have a lot of things to achieve and work out.. but I just don't have any motivation to carry out my task.. I don't know what exactly happen to me or I don't even have passion in my studies anymore?? I hope I am not.. I hope it's just I think too much.. I hope it's just a part of my growing process.... Long time didn't post.. although I felt guilty and sorry to those who cares of me, it's just a matter of scare.. the scare to post things online... the mst excited period for me in this year(until this moment) was the 3 days broadcasting shooting period and 3 days post production, editing period... even though it's quite a hard time but I felt happy, enjoyable and at least... it worth it... !!!!!!

Friendship

Because of getting into groups for assignments, problems occured! This is what I have expected but it's not what I willing to see... Although everyone may have change and I think it's highly possible for whom I think would change, I couldn't haardly believe this tragedy to happen among us... We are now frustrated with what had happened, and I also felt regret to what had happened... I wish this could just past away by itself... and hope everyone of us don't have any hurt feeling with this... It may be a hard semester, but in another way, I know we could come across this challenge... I'm so sorry for those who really wanted to do assignments with me, I'd tried my very best to rearrange so that everyone could have a chance to work with me but you know, it's not going to be very fair and equal... I'm sure you all can do your best without me too... trust yourself..

Brainstorming

Having the same problem as last time... communication problem is the most biggest problem in this world, I've learnt to realise no one could actually saying their true feelings to you....the process is always the same.. suffering, solving and keep on moving.. there's no other choice... too many things came in together, it's now making me breathless... Have to come out with lots of print advertisement ideas, radio advertisement idea and video idea yet people around is still making problem.. don't exactly know what caused the problem and those problems always stuck in my mind.. and deadline is rushing to to come out with ideas to move on with my assignments... i hate that kind of feeling...

May God bless me

My Week 1 of year 2 past with terrible sickness.. Still,I haven't recover from my sickness, don't really know why am I having long, suffer sickness.. As I know, I must recover as soon as possible because the 'war' is going to begin from week 2(means tomorrow).. going to have loads of assignments and classes.. quite a busy year but it wouldn't push me down.. I'm going to do my best.. lately having problems with group members, don't know who to choose or do things with.. actually, for me, it's the same.. now, I don't really expect anything, I just hope I can handle along with happiness.. God bless me :) anyway, having shoting for next week... good luck to me and wish i could have great ideas about what to shot... (in wondering and brainstorming situation)

Back to University

I've started my new semester 2007.. I'm no longer year 1 broadcasting student but year 2 semester 1 student.. don't feel really good today coz my university is so so so crowded.. Even worst is there's so any people in a same lecture, the air-cond is so limited, I almost can't breath inside... Had my Communication Theories and Intro to Advertising this morning.. just a simple intro to each course.. pretty bored actually.. Guess what.. UTAR merged May intake year 1 student with us(Year2 sem1 student).. Someone said that is because they can't take pendidikan moral this sem therefore, they have to do intro to advertising first.. hehe:p at least they must do pendidikan moral... hahahaha..:D Went home at 2pm.. not feeling well started from this early morning.. until afternoon I'm sure I'm sick.. have terribly sore throat and headache.. *sigh* sick in the first day of school... T_T $@^!*#&%

I'm myself

Hmm.. don't feel like posting here anymore because I want myself to be my true self, telling the true life.. why am I writing here again is because my true friends, who always stay besides me, telling me I'm not updating my blog... I'm glad to have them besides me.. sure everyone is interested to know actually what happened to me, but as usual, I don't really like to talk about it anymore.. it hurts me and affects me deeply.. although I'm quite ok when people look at me now, I know I'm not that ok and I would feel like crying too when I thought of this things happened on me.. Someone who helps me a lot said I'm too negative in thinking and I would say to myself that this is not positive or negative but facing the real situation.. I don't know who would read my blog,maybe someone who wants to treat me or maybe (positive abit) someone who really cares me... I hope to express my true self and that's why today I'm here again.. I'll stay with my true words in this blog.. I'm not opening a chat box.. so if you wanna tell me something you can do it in comment(under each post), I'll definitely know... don't worry.. ^.^

The End

Hmmm... long time didn't post.. lately quite busy joining camp and doing my own things:p and forgot to post.. but usually december(the end of one year and coming of another new year) have to do a lot of things.. seeing all my old friends, since they finish STPM and some of them is going overseas soon.. )*sigh* I will miss them very very much.. A few weeks ago, one of my best friend just went back to her own country.. Don't know whether we could meet each other again or not.. I wish she would and I'm sure she will do good in everything...Great wishes to you !!! muackss!!! >.<

"Teacher" vs Teacher

Went to shopping with my friend today and i bought a lot of stuff... hahaha:D very happy till this moment because long time didn't go for shopping... I saw one of my teacher when I was having my lunch... she's a good teacher but I don't really familiar with her so I didn't greet her... but I realize one thing, she smoked.... that's surprised me because in my impression, one teacher should have act like a teacher... although nowadays smoking is common, especially for women, I just can't understand why should a person who educates people act differently in their life.... that raise a question, is it nowadays teacher only "teach" student what's in the textbook but not how to behave in a good way in life? maybe I wouldn't have that answer... everyday, the world is changing... that's too many things I can't understand....

Night Life

I luv n prefer beautiful, romantic night life

I'm totally fall into a deep dilemma... I think I have to adjust myself to my life,my philosophy and others many many more... having kind of normal life now, but I feel something missing in my life... I don't know what is it about and that's why recently I'm more emotional compared to last time... I'll be more sensitive than others time when it comes to night, especially late in the night... although it makes me feel ad sometimes, I still prefer to stay awake late in the night... I love night life... no matter I spend my night life at home or outside, I'll feel night is the beautiful, romantic moment for a whole day.... ^.^

娱协奖 PWH Music Awards

Yesterday was an excited day for me because I was able to attend a grand chinese music awards,娱协奖, at Bukit Jalil Putra Stadium...wow... really thanks to wai leng for giving me tickets, thanks and congrats to you... it was a great successful music awards I could ever seen in Malaysia.. feel proud of what you and your colleagues had done in this music awards... and shin yee, hahaha... you are honest!!! *give you the honest awards* you didn't lie to me, it was a really great and youch music awards... so exciting watching guang liang also, I love all of his songs very much, especially tong hua(Fairytale) and tian tang(Heaven)... wow... it's amazing!!!! this musicawards makes me fely that every singer in M'sia are very good in composing music, what a talented musician they are... even some of those popular songs in Taiwan were composed by m'sian musician... everthing is just fantastic.... too proud of them... I believed definitely theyare going to have a bright future in this music world... congrats a lot :D

Joy of Life

Recently I'm too free but I really enjoy the life I have.. Sometimes it's just too good to stay alone.. but in another time I have my friend with me... glad everthing is perfectly OK recently... I'm able to sleep till 9 sumthing in the morning.. if I decide to stay at home the whole day, then TV becomes the most important things for me.... switch on the TV, sitting comfortably on the sofa,reading novel and drinking wine..... wow... do you realize? it's an extremely fabulous life I'm having... If there's no interesting programme to watch on, I'll switch it to ASTRO radio.. there's a great channel, classical music channel... every classical music spark up your life... do you envy about my life? Hmmm... you're able to create your own joy of life too, right?

Sunway Lagoon Day

It's an unforgettable saturday. I went to Sunway Lagoon today with my family and siblings. Having lots of fun at Sunway Lagoon. It's been a long time since I last visited to there, therefore I really miss it and enjoy it. And today is my mum's campany, KPMG, family day too. Every employees and their family member were invited to attend their company's family day. Hence, we went to enjoy fantastically without paying... hehe :p don't envy o.... The whole day including the buffet lunch provided was good but I think there's a bad thing too... The only bad thing happened on me... my skin had become SO SO SO SO black and I realise some part where I wore swimming suit had two tone in colour.... T_T haih... how sad to see that....

Our future is bright

Feeling bored and wondering whetherI should go out for a tea with my friend.... but after a while i've decided to forget it because everyone is so busy with their own life... sometimes me myself is the same too.... especially those friends who is now feeling stress and tension of the coming SPTM... I know you all can do it :) you all always work so hard.... I believe everything would go smoothly... don't worry ok? :D I'm trying my best too.... we fight together!!!! hahahhaha :D

I'm awake

Didn't blog for such a long time because don't feel like wanna blog at all... It's a one week public holiday(but for me everyday is a holiday.. hahaha :D) went back to mum's hometown Gerik for one weeks time, totally release by now... although we have to travel for a long journey but i think it's worth.. I didn't have much time to go back and spend time with all my cute cousin since i grown up... this trip let awaken me that everything is just a tiny part of life... see everyone in Gerik, they're so happy, so generous, so kind and so so so true... I love this true feeling so much... :) they have gone through lots of thing in life but they can still live happily... this is what we called the attitude of life...

Thanks loads

Didn't post for a long time since I was in a serious dilemma about myself and my life... Now I've "reborn" because I understand life can't be changed much although you try any harder... I've met my old friends (and somehow my true friends) these few days... really enjoy the moment I spent with them...Thanks for always beside me and giving me loads of support, I truly appreciate all of your efforts.... XD anyway, I knew some of my university's friend cared me a lots, thank you very much... hehe :p since we are having long term holiday, we are still keeping in touch till now... I was surprised and glad to have you all as my friend too... but it's not enough for us to sms, and chit-chatting at msn o... we must get together and go yam cha o... >.<

Useless World

I'm totally speechless against this world... can't everyone just try to think of others? I'm helpless... don't know what can I do to myself and my own life... it's just gone it's meaning... I don't know when and why I started to be like this but I hope to end this kind of feeling very soon.. no mood to write anymore...

My b-day

I've disappointed with my life and everything happened.. useless and speechless now... I know it's not easy to get through life but isn't that too much for me? Today is my 19th Birthday... I'm quiet happy on this day.. I lost a friends and finally I 'found' it back... many of us are too happy to have this friends back... A lot of funny things happened on today as well... I felt too touch to have this group of friend because they let me know that I'm not alone... their present even surprising and really shocked me because I didn't thought of 'that' as present before... It's showed and proved they really cared of me.. they really take my words into heart... Thank you loads... I love you all very much!!! you all make me stronger and brave enough to live it on... =) Although it's a great 26 Septenber 2006, I end up crying for my last 30 minutes birthday because of stupid, idiot matter (at least this matter had been bothering me for quiet a long period).... I hate those feeling that suddenly came up to me... I shoudn't been crying for so long because of those unnecessary matter.... Useless !!!!!!

Run from life

It's already a few days having gastric.. it seems like it didn't get any better.. mood also didn't change.. still depressed, struggling in heart.. day after day I realize I don't know how to face human.. sad to say that human is too complicated in their own way.. you wish everything should be fine and ok but it isn't go your way.. you wish to have the ability to solve every problem in your life but you definitely couldn't.. and that's the reason why most of the people choose to run away from life.. dilemma is one part of life which we couldn't avoid.. for me, I don't think I'm brave enough to face my life.. yet I don't have the ability to face human.. I've done my best.. I hope I am.. when I don't know what should I do it's most probably the time for me to run.. or what I can say is my ability only allow me to run away..

Real world

lately quite tired with the life I have.. life is really not easy.. Sometimes I really don't know what should and shouldn't be expect in life... surprisingly, life is not as easy as math.. it's not always being equal and please.. don't ever expect equal treatment in life.. these few days I really learn a lot... son't expect the same way as you treat people... don't trust anyone (even you think the one that closest to you)... don't ever try to put your heart to anyone or any matter... if not.. in turn, you are the one that will get hurt.. that kind of feeling no one can understand even though you try to share with others... don't be kind to others, people will think you have intention towards them or trying to show off how helpful you are... is time for me to wake up... I'm here to welcome myself into the real world...

Disappointed Day

Finally final exam is over... actually quite happy and release.. but it's quite tiring as well because I couldn't sleep last night... totally lost in my own world... thinking about everything happened on me... decided to go to Sg Wang after exam but incidentally... something very sad happended... *haih* I'm really disappointed wih all kind of things happened... we've been waiting for a girl for a long time.. (at least 1 and a half hour) not only we couldn't get her... we don't even know why acually she need so much time.. if you really need so much time, why don't you just tell directly.. *sigh* I really couldn't take on this kind of attitude.. I hope she will change after i've told her about her CRAZY LATE MISTAKE... Melanie is now finish writing.. a special blog writing at MC... Signing Off...

up in tower.... * girl's team *

nice scene....

hehe.... dun act cute wif my cyndi's cap lor....

great time... me n siew man ;p

hav fun.....